Five Ways to Resolve Conflict

The other day I was in the library and I saw someone. Someone I really didn’t want to talk to. So, I slid behind the nearest bookshelf and quickly exited the building. Not the most mature or neighborly behavior. But, I really wanted to avoid this person.

Most people do the same thing when it comes to conflict.

They avoid it. Hide from it. Duck behind a bookshelf, a computer, a cell phone, a deadline – anything to avoid the conflict.

They just don’t want to go through the upheaval, drama, blood and guts. Better to side step the issue. Make nice. Or covertly get what you want anyway by working around, instead of confronting, the other person.

What’s so unpleasant about conflict?

It tends to bring out the worst aspects of our personalities and our most sniveling, conniving, or violent behaviors. We fear the consequences – to our work, our relationships, our reputation, our selves.

Of course, some people leap into the fray with sword swinging.

But, they too are driven by fear. And their aggressive strategy reduces the possibility of creatively arriving at a shared agreement.

Conflicts of opinion, needs, and goals are inevitable when you work in highly interdependent and complex organization (world). The question becomes how can you enter into the conflict in ways that will increase trust, upgrade the final decision, and improve the clarity of communication.

Here are five ways:

(As you read these think about a specific conflict your facing).

1) Expand the Frame.

Your conflict is about some specific issue, project, decision, or action. But, when you’re deep in the conflict it can seem HUGE. It’s huge because you’ve narrowed your perspective; you’ve shrunk the frame until the only thing in the picture is the conflict.

When the frame of your vision is small, the conflict looms large. It’s as if your whole career, future, being is riding on the resolution of this conflict.

But, if expand the frame, pull back, and include it as one element in the larger picture of your life – it takes on more manageable proportions.

As you look back over your life, you’ll see that many of the HUGE issues, conflicts, and emergencies that overwhelmed you in the past simply . . . evaporated. What consumed all of your attention and energy at one time, is now just a memory or even an amusing anecdote.

The conflict you’re in now is the same.

It will, in the not too distant future, be consigned to a dusty back shelf in your memory closet. If you bother to hold onto it at all.

So, take a breath. Take a mental step back and expand your frame.

2) Turn down your amplifier.

In the movie Spinal Tap, the band’s amplifiers could be turned all the way up to “11”. Beyond the traditional “10” to really loud. When, you’re in conflict, your emotional amplifier gets dialed up. Maybe not to 11. But, up there.

Even if you carefully control the volume, tone, and tempo of your voice and the muscles in your face – people feel your emotional intensity. To them, you’re at 11.

Humans are wired to receive emotional messages. And if your emotions are yelling – it doesn’t matter if your voice is whispering.

Turn your emotional amplifier down by focusing directly on your body. Notice where the tensions are and consciously relax those parts of your body. Breathe deeply, slowly, mindfully. Just two or three mindful breaths can immediately reset your parasympathetic nervous system, and dial your amplifier back to easy listening mode.

3) Shift the focus from “it” to “us”.

It’s easy in conflict to focus on the technical details – the issue, the stuff. You wantblue carpet. They want brown.

You prefer one vendor. They prefer another.

But, the deeper you dig into the details, the deeper the conflict grows.

Another place to focus is on your relationship. On the way you’re relating to each other. Drop the issue. Deal with what’s happening between you.

Consider whether the quality, tone, and direction of the conversation reflect the kind of relationship you want to build? Reflect on what would make the interaction more positive, useful, and enriching?

Raise these questions. Answer them for yourself. And explore them with the other person.

Talk about how you want to engage with each other when you’re in conflict. Don’t deny that conflicts exist or pretend that they won’t ever come back in the future. Rather, explore how you can use conflicts to strengthen trust, increase creativity, and enhance the quality of the final decision.

4) Find a toehold.

My brother took me rock climbing a few years ago. I only made it a few feet up the face of the rock. Why?

I couldn’t find the toeholds. Yet, my brother was able to ascend the face of the rock using just the tiniest toe and finger holds.

It’s the same when dealing with conflicts. You can move the conversation in a positive direction if you look for a tiny toehold. Just a tiny place of alignment or agreement.

Don’t rush the process. Don’t lunge for conclusion. Just get a toehold.

You’ll need to look for it. And even if it seems too small to matter, remember that resolving conflicts is like rock climbing. You don’t need a big wide ledge of agreement. Just a toehold will do. You can leverage that toehold agreement to move the conversation forward.

5) Raise a flag.

When the flag goes up, everyone salutes. When the anthem is played, everyone stands and sings. Flags and anthems move us and bind us together.

When you’re in conflict, you need to raise a flag. Not a white flag of defeat. But, the flag of higher purpose and mission.

You need to raise – into awareness – the purpose that binds you and the person you’re in conflict with together.

Two people who share a common purpose can still be in conflict. They can still deeply disagree about how to best serve their shared purpose. But, when the flag goes up, they let go of the conflict, to join together in saluting, and honoring something that they both love and serve.

It’s important to raise the flag that binds you together. And to recognize that beneath the conflict there is a shared mission that you both serve.

Questions for Action & Reflection:

Expand the frame.

What shifts when you consider this problem in the larger context of your life?

Turn down your amp.

How can you turn down your emotional amplifier to at least 4?

Shift from “it” to “us”.

What would you do differently if you were as focused on strengthening the relationship as you’re focused on the issue?

Find a toehold.

Where are you and the other person already in alignment and agreement?

Raise a flag.

What’s the mission you both serve? How can that help you through the conflict?

About the Author: Eric Klein (http://dharmaconsulting.com/about-us/about-eric-klein/)

Original Link: http://dharmaconsulting.com/2010/five-ways-to-resolve-conflict/

Five Ways For Managers to Resolve Conflict

Today another blogger and I mixed it up. Our editor loved it. Wonderful.

As conflict goes, it was pretty lightweight stuff. I said one thing, he said another; so what? We never have to see each other or sit in the same room together. For all I know we're not even on the same continent.

It got me thinking. Bloggers can agree to disagree and readers can decide what resonates with them. But it's different in the corporate world. You have to work, travel, and sit in endless meetings together. And sometimes you even have to come to ... consensus. Sends a shiver down your spine, doesn't it?

It's tough for management teams. Sooner or later they have to agree on stuff, important stuff like operating plans, strategic goals, customer requirements, product specifications, marketing plans, budgets, channel strategy, hiring plans, layoff plans, it goes on and on.

I've worked with management teams that bickered about everything and couldn't agree on anything. I've worked with CEOs who acted out their childhood dramas on everybody, passive aggressive managers who said one thing and did exactly the opposite, and back-stabbers who had it in for me since day one. And I was no angel either, that's for sure. 

Management teams are a veritable Petri dish for conflict. It makes you wonder how anything gets done at all. Really.

But guess what? After decades of pain and agony, I've actually learned a few effective ways of resolving conflict. They're guaranteed to work. No kidding.

Five ways for managers to resolve conflict

1. Embrace conflict. Conflict isn't necessarily a bad thing. If it's open and direct, it helps in dealing with issues and building consensus. Intel's famous for having a culture that embraces conflict called "constructive confrontation" and a useful tool called "disagree and commit."
2. 
   
3. Challenge your own assumptions. I had a CEO who used to say that conflict is the result of people making different assumptions. Ask yourself what assumptions your position is based on, then do the same with the other person. Perhaps she has experience different from yours that might change your perspective.
4. 
   
5. Focus on the issues, not the person. When you criticize or attack someone personally you burn bridges you may never be able to repair. Stop whining and get over yourself. Focus on the real issues - technology, products, customers - you know, what the company's actually paying you to do.
6. 
   
7. Put yourself in the other person's shoes. Remember, he's human too. Ask for his viewpoint and test your listening skills by articulating it back to him. Then try to get him to do the same in reverse. It's an age-old technique that works in negotiations, too.
8. 
   
9. Be open and honest. I can't overstate this point. Much conflict comes from long-standing issues that build up over time. Since they're never brought to the fore, they never heal and leak out in all your interactions with that person. Meet one-on-one and air it out. She probably feels the same way you do.

Last Word 
The ability to drive consensus among diverse executives with unique perspectives and opinions is a serious leadership skill that'll facilitate your climb up the corporate ladder, assuming that's where you want to go. Happy climbing.




About the Author
Steve Tobak is a consultant and former high-tech senior executive. He's managing partner ofInvisor Consulting, a management consulting and business strategy firm. Contact Steve, follow him on Facebook, or connect on LinkedIn.


Original Link: http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-505125_162-28241434/five-ways-for-managers-to-resolve-conflict/

Five Ways To Iron Out Differences With the Boss

CONFLICTS WITH the boss can be rooted in working styles, or even in personality clashes. Mahima Puri suggests ways to deal with both.

1 Understand Expectations Conflicts may arise if there is a mismatch between the boss’ expectations and the subordinate’s understanding of these. “If the boss is unable to clearly state the deliverables, the employee should make an effort to seek clarity,” says the HR head of a BPO, who does not wish to be named. 

2 Have a Healthy Dialogue Marico has a ‘peace time forum’ exercise, wherein the senior management meets regularly and informally, says Milind Sarwate, group CFO & CHRO. “It allows us to know each other better, communicate effectively and take a balanced view,” he adds. 

3 Stay Positive “If you begin a dialogue thinking the other person is not ready to listen or will not understand your point of view, the exercise will not work,” says Ronesh Puri, managing director (India), Executive Access. 

4 Focus on Issues While resolving conflicts, focus only on work issues and not the boss’ nature or behaviour. “Taking a professional approach helps,” adds Sarwate. 

5 Change Yourself If the conflict continues, it is preferable to adapt to the situation. “Since bosses are in a more powerful position, it is always better to avoid conflict with them. Give an opportunity to let things become normal,” says management and life skills trainer Yadhav Mehra.

(The Economic Times, Mumbai, 25-05-2012)

Five Ways To Pull Yourself Out of Workaholism

‘In sickness and in health and till death do us part’ — if these are the vows your family and friends think you have exchanged with your Blackberry/ keyboard/iPad, then you are a certified workaholic. The symptoms are many, but some of the significant ones are that you punch away nonstop, receive every call from office and take your meals at odd hours to finish that extra bit at work. All this leads to anxiety disorders, repetitive stress injury, mental and physical fatigue, and this strong alliance with work is best severed at the start. Devina Sengupta suggests how you can do that.  

1 Draw Clear Boundaries Clocking out of work is just as important as clocking in. Working post-office hours is acceptable if there is an urgent assignment but if it becomes a habit, alarm bells should start ringing. It helps to unplug phones and computers during vacations and non-working hours.  

2 Check on Employees Employers need to look into the employees’ attendance sheets and office hours. Sabre, for instance, found that despite giving employees access to wellness centres, counselling sessions and discount coupons at gyms, they were still packing in extra hours at work. The firm, therefore, does not offer the option of carrying forward holidays .  

3 Say a Firm ‘No’ ‘Workaholics anonymous’ groups don’t exist, but instead, a simple ‘no’ can go a long way. Complete your tasks first, and only if there is time to spare, offer another a helping hand. Once the tasks are done, wait for the next day to start on the new list of chores.  

4 Extra isn’t Always Healthy The boss often thinks that those who work round the clock are the productive ones. But a smart worker can be someone who punches in the required hours, completes his work and leaves office on time too. In a recent Randstad survey of stateowned companies, 80% of employees said they received work-related calls and emails beyond office hours. Nearly 69% said they volunteered to work post-office hours while 79% received work-related calls and emails on holidays. Long hours lead to a dip in productivity and creativity. 

 
5  Watch your Schedule Often, the employee in the cubicle next to you could be a night owl at the office, but that need not be your style. Excessive breaks, long watercooler conversations will ultimately lead to more time in the office, and not a very fruitful schedule.

(The Economic Times, Mumbai, 22-05-12)

MANAGING A SUDDEN LAYOFF is anyone’s worst nightmare. It doesn’t have to be. Steer clear of the guilt trip, accept the challenge head on and take swift action, says Anumeha Chaturvedi 

1 ACCEPT THE REALITY The emotional turmoil of what’s next, why me, is bound to disturb you, but acceptance is critical for moving on. “Allow yourself to grieve, but move on without wasting too much emotional energy. Be realistic, accept the facts and get on with it,” says Raman Munjal chair professor of leadership studies at MDI, Gurgaon Asha Bhandarkar. “Just as employees move on for better options, they should be prepared for layoffs. Once this basic expectation is set, preparing for such eventualities becomes easier,” she adds. 

2 DO NOT BADMOUTH Restraining from expressing your displeasure towards colleagues and bosses can be hard but remember you may need their assistance in reference checks and recommendations. “One must control the tendency to express these emotions. Negative emotions possibly get disseminated across the grapevine faster than positive emotions and result in loss of social capital,” says Bhandarkar. 

3 TAP YOUR RESOURCES Leverage your contacts: trustworthy seniors and colleagues, to the best of your ability. For all you know, they might be the ones pointing you to the new job. Founder and CEO of networking portal Apna Circle Yogesh Bansal feels job portals and networking sites provide an excellent opportunity for building one’s brand and networking. 

4 APPLY, APPLY AND APPLY “Don’t think brand alone, think work profile and learning opportunity. No fancy company and title can give you the kind of accelerated learning which a challenging job can, adding weight to your CV,” says Bhandarkar. 

5 EDUCATE AND UPDATE YOURSELF An exit is a good time to take stock of things you might have missed out on— spending time with family, enrolling for a specialised course or a degree. “Explore the fields that you have always been interested in but never got the chance to try,” says Bansal.

(The Economic Times, Mumbai, 18-05-2012)

Five Ways To Handling a Career Transition

It’s never easy to get out of the comfort zone of an existing career and dive into something completely new. The older you get and the higher you climb on the career ladder, the more unsettling it may get to make that switch. Nevertheless, a career transition, if handled the right way, can be just the right ticket to a fresh lease of professional life, says Sreeradha D Basu. 

1 TAKE STOCK OF PRIORITIES Do a self-analysis before taking the plunge, advises MD of head hunting firm Executive Access Ronesh Puri. "List out all your skills as well as the challenges you anticipate in the new career. Identify how your previous experience can complement your new role," he says. 

2 DON’T BE SCARED TO TAKE A RISK Your priorities keep changing, so you might need to do a coursecorrection. Don’t be scared to experiment. "A lot of people are riskaverse. But nothing in life is zerorisk," says Puri. If you are at a stage in your life when you are not in a position to take that risk, postpone your decision. But don’t let it constrict you, he adds. 

3 HAVE A BACK-UP PLAN What is your continuity plan? How will you handle things if your new career doesn’t pan out well for you? Your confidence levels will be much higher if you have a back-up plan in place. 

4 PLAN YOUR FINANCES WELL In certain cases, a career transition may involve a reduction in income and a consequent hit on finances. That’s why you need to think ahead about how to manage your family obligations, EMIs and other expenses. It could mean cutting down on your indulgences; dipping into your savings or some other avenue. 

5 ENHANCE YOUR SKILLS Develop new skills that are required for the career change. Take an online programme or read up as much as you can about your new career choice. "Acquire all the skills, knowledge and information possible about the new field before entering it. Do your groundwork well," says CEO of executive search firm Symbiosis Management Consultants Vinay Grover.

(The Economic Times, Mumbai, 15-05-2012)

Five Ways To Find a Job in a Tough Market

Getting a new job may be tough in a glum economic environment,but that should not deter you from looking. Following some easy, yet often ignored, steps should help you sail through, says Anumeha Chaturvedi. 

1 Map your Competency “Individuals should identify the skill sets they are good at and should look for industries where they fit in,” says Sunil Goel, director of executive search firm GlobalHunt. Perry Madan, executive director at EWS Search, adds: “When times are hard, people should think out of the box and concentrate on the skill sets rather than limiting themselves to their industry.” 

2 List your Options Make a list of companies you wish to work for and identify their structures and hiring cycles. “One could make two separate lists — of companies that are most desired and companies that are not high on priority, but can work as a platform for getting another posting elsewhere,” says Goel. 

3 Go Glocal A lot of MNCs are ramping up operations across the country, and not just the metros. “Tier II, tier III cities and rural markets have plenty of opportunities and a lot of companies within the F&B and education space have ambitious plans for such areas. One should not hesitate in exploring such opportunities,” says Madan.

4 Meet People Get active on social networking websites and job portals, and meet people if possible. “It is always better to meet people rather than mailing or calling them, as face value has a greater recall ,” says Goel. 

5 Be Specific Your profile should be specific and highlight work areas and expertise. Avoid overloading your resume to prevent misrepresentation.

(The Economic Times, Mumbai, 11-05-2012)

Five Ways To Establish a Rapport with the New Boss

WHETHER YOUR equation with your old boss was great, or or not so good, it’s always a challenge adjusting to a new boss. Sreeradha D Basu gives you some pointers on how to build a rapport.

Do your Due Diligence Take time to learn all you can about your new boss. “Understanding what is important to the boss is a sure shot way to establish rapport,” says Makarand Khatavkar, MD & HR head for Deutsche Bank Group in India.

Get Feedback “Ask your new boss what you can do to produce better work and what you need to change. That way, your new boss knows you are willing to go the extra mile,” says Gurdeep Walia, executive in a market research firm.

Make Yourself Useful Figure out ways in which you can be relevant. “Identify the opportunities. For instance, if your boss needs extra help on an assignment and you pitch in, that will make a good impression,” says Khatavkar.

Watch what you Say Don’t try to earn brownie points by badmouthing your old boss, and don’t start discussing the new boss’ shortcomings with co-workers.

Stay Within Limits Be punctual, focused and deadlineoriented. Work hard and always give it your best shot. At the same time, don’t promise more than you can deliver. Otherwise you risk damaging your reputation at work.

(The Economic Times, Mumbai, 08-05-2012)

Five Ways To Arrest a Burnout in Early Stages

In today’s fast-paced world, burnouts are becoming as common as the flu. Professionals from the medical field have expressed concern over cases not only among executives, but also students and young adults. This is why it has become important to identify a burnout and deal with it early. Mahima Puri suggests a few ways to cope. 

1 Identify the Burnout A burnout is typically a combination of physical, mental and emotional stress, which leads to fatigue. You then acquire an early stage of stagnation, which impacts your output or desire to do things well, says Dr Samir Parikh, consultant psychiatrist with Max Healthcare. 

2 Recognise the Cause Some jobs, such as voice-based ones at BPOs, are likely to result in burnout, says Sanjay Gupta, global head — HR at ExlService. “When customers are dissatisfied, they may say things that increase stress levels. We have dealt with this in our company,” he says. Similarly, not taking regular breaks from work is likely to lead to burnout. 

3 Meet People It is important to socialise, talk to people and enjoy lighter moments, says Dr Parikh. “Sometimes, taking long breaks could help, while for others, a short weekly break might do the trick,” he adds. 

4 Get a Change of Scene A change in job or work may help address a burnout, says Mr Gupta. However, Dr Parikh says a mere change may not always help. “If you have identified the cause, it may not be important to change something at the workplace. It could be an issue related to your home, which you may have ignored,” he adds. At the same time, at work, a high-potential performer’s work profile could be changed. “This will keep him going,” he adds. 

5 Take Preventive Steps “It is not easy to pull yourself out of burnout and to get back to your old self. So the ideal way is to not let it happen,” Dr Parikh says. He advises regular breaks from work, engaging with family and friends more often and pursuing hobbies and interests.

(The Economic Times, Mumbai, 04-05-2012)

Five Ways To Prioritise Your Tasks

Getting it sorted is half the task done. Labeled, segregated work schedules help an employee differentiate the important from the regular. It’s never too late to get organised, as Devina Sengupta suggests. 

1 Keep Reminders Sapna Agarwal , head of Career Advancement services at IIM-B, started maintaining a black book listing all her tasks when she started working. For others, reminders on the phone help. Post-it notes too can come in handy for those who want a quick-fix. 

2 Do Things Quickly Getting a task done when it is important can help avoid the build-up later, says Kumud Rajendran, CEO of emotional wellness firm Optimice. 

3 Review the Task List Take a look at the work done at the end of the day and then carry on from where it was left . “There is no point in adding new tasks to the list when old ones remain,” says Rajendran. 

4 Tackle Emergencies When an urgent task is to be attended to, Nirmala Menon, founder and CEO of Interweave Consulting, gives her phone to one of her team members who takes her other calls to ensure the business runs smoothly. 

5 Allot Time Those on top of their game often have their work slotted and every chore has a specific time allotted to it. In case of an overlap, it becomes that much easier to analyse where the lag was.

(The Economic Times, Mumbai, 01-05-2012)

Five Powerful Ways to Make Time for Your Dreams

Written by Ali Luke

Whatever your life looks like right now, I suspect that you wish you had a bit more time to pursue the things that really matter to you.

Maybe you want to write a novel, or travel around the world, or switch to a new career, or get fit and healthy … whatever your dreams are, they’re important. The trouble is, it’s so hard to find the time to actually work towards them.

Here are five ways to make the time for your dreams. Even if you only try one or two of these, you’ll find that you’re making progress. And the more progress you make, the easier it’ll be to continue.

#1: Set Yourself a Minimum Target

It’s easy to slip into an all-or-nothing mindset when you’re working on big goals. If you’re on a diet, for instance, you might give up entirely after one bad day. If you’re trying to write a book, you might think that you have to have two hours free before you can sit down to work on it.

Instead of setting yourself challenging targets (and beating yourself up for failing to reach them), try setting a minimum target. That might look like:

• Eating a healthy breakfast every day
• Writing for 15 minutes every day
• Removing five items of clutter from your house each day
• Exercising for ten minutes every day

Whenever you reach your minimum target, put an X on the calendar. Your aim is to create a whole string of Xs.

(Your minimum target doesn’t have to be daily, but if you can manage that, it’s a great way to build up momentum.)

#2: Cut Down Your Commitments

Do you feel as though you can never quite catch up with all the things that you need to get done? Maybe you’ve got a tendency to jump at every shiny new idea that comes along (I know I do!) or you hate to say “no” to anyone.

If your commitments are stopping you from having time for your dreams, look at ways to cut down. That might mean:

• Stepping down from a voluntary position (even if you need to give a few months’ notice)
• Asking family members to take on more chores
• Delegating some of your tasks at work, so you can go home on time

Once you’ve managed to get rid of some commitments, don’t immediately sign up for more. Practise saying “no” … or if that’s too tough, tell people that now isn’t a good time, but they’re welcome to ask you again in a few months.

#3: Beat Procrastination

Hopefully, your dreams inspire you; they help give your life meaning, and you feel motivated to reach towards them.

At the same time, your dreams might seem intimidating. Perhaps you’ve got a very long way to go before you reach your goal, or you face a lot of hard work in the process … and it’s easy to fall into a pattern of procrastination.

If you constantly find yourself making excuses for not doing anything towards your dreams, procrastination is to blame. Maybe you really want to lose some weight … but you always put off starting your diet until Monday, or after a friend’s birthday party, or after your vacation. Maybe you really want to write a book … but every evening, you end up watching TV for three hours and writing precisely nothing.

To get on top of procrastination, try one of these tips:

• Tell yourself “I’ll just do five minutes.” I find this works brilliantly for both exercise and writing! Once you get going, you’ll almost certainly be able to do more.
• Write a clear list of next steps towards your goal. It’s easy to procrastinate when things are unclear.
• Make a commitment to someone else. Arrange to work out with your sister, or tell all your friends on Facebook that you’re going to declutter one room this weekend.

#4: Improve Your Finances

Whatever your dreams are, a stronger financial situation will help you reach them faster. If you’ve got plenty of money in the bank, you’re in a great position to:

• Cut down your hours slightly at work, so you have more time for your dreams
• Buy tools, equipment, or supplies that you might need
• Attend conferences or courses that will help you towards your goal

You’re also likely to feel more secure and motivated. Ideally, you’ll want to work towards having an emergency fund; several months of living expenses in the bank. If your dream involves switching careers, travelling for an extended period, or working for yourself, then a financial safety net makes it much easier to take the plunge.

#5: Plan Ahead

Although it would be nice if hours of free time would magically appear from nowhere, that rarely happens! If you want time to work on your dreams, you need to plan ahead.

Take out your diary and look at the next few weeks. You might have a lot on during the next few days … but by looking further ahead, you can carve out some time. Put appointments with yourself into your diary, and honor them. Aim for:

• One full weekend in the next six months (perhaps for a creative retreat or a vacation that ties into your goal)
• One Saturday or Sunday in the next two months
• One full afternoon in the next month
• Two hours in the next week

(If you can find more time, go for it … these are minimums to get you moving.)

You might want to look around for events, group meetups, conferences, and so on that fit in with your dream. If you’ve got a specific event in your diary (especially if you’ve paid for it) then you’re even more likely to stick to what you’ve planned.

Whatever your dreams are, they matter, and they’re worth spending time on. If you’ve got a great tip to add, or if you’d like to share your goals and your next steps with us, just leave a comment below.

Photo credit: ‘Bench on Green Grass‘ from Big Stock

Author: Ali Luke

Original Link: http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/5-powerful-ways-to-make-time-for-your-dreams/

Five Ways to Keep Learning (And Why You Want To)

Written by Ali Luke

It’s easy to assume that learning ends when you’re in your early twenties. You finish university, and go into the “real world” of work. No more term papers, no more exams. A lot of people hardly ever pick up a book again – except perhaps to read on vacation.

But really, whether you want to or not, you’re going to carry on learning throughout your life. You’ll learn new skills at work. You might learn how to be a parent. You may take up DIY, or simply learn enough about your home to maintain it in good condition. You might well have a hobby which means mastering a new skill.

Some people never give learning much thought. They pick up bits and pieces in an unstructured way, learning just enough to get through the job at hand. Often, they just shrug and give up – calling out a handyman for every little thing, or asking a colleague at work to do something “difficult” for them.

If you ignore the important of continuous learning, you’ll find:

• You waste money. You keep needing to pay for professional help – when it’s a task that you could’ve learnt how to do yourself. Maybe you “can’t cook” so you always eat out.
• You miss opportunities. You get passed over for promotions, because you don’t show any interest in picking up new skills at work.
• You lose a great source of fun and fulfillment. There’s enormous satisfaction to be found in learning things and really getting a new concept or skill. Don’t let any bad memories of school put you off.

So how can you keep on learning throughout your adult life?

Find a Career Which Matches Your Interests

If you’re in a so-so job which doesn’t really engage you, you won’t be very motivated to keep growing your skills and knowledge. Look for a career which hooks into the stuff which interests you: it’ll be more rewarding in itself, but it’ll also be an easier, faster way for you to progress.

You might already know what you’d love to do. What’s holding you back? If you’re not sure how to get from where you are to where you want to be, then a great starting point for your learning journey is to map out the path!

Look Into Training Courses at Work

Many larger employers offer formal training opportunities, ranging from in-house courses to financial support with a college degree. Talk to your HR department to find out what’s on offer, or mention to your manager that you’re interested in learning more about a specific area.

If you work for a small employer, don’t rule out the value of informal training. Perhaps you can get a colleague to teach you a new software package, or maybe you can get some books on expenses.

Attend Conferences and Seminars

It’s often hard to find time to sit down and read a book, work through a guide or practice a new skill: life just seems to get in the way. By heading to a conference or seminar, you’ve blocked out time on your schedule for learning and networking.

When you’re signing up to attend particular panels, don’t just go for familiar topics. Pick something which falls outside your comfort zone: even if some of it goes over your head, you’re almost certain to pick up some fresh new ideas.

Get Into a Habit of Regular Reading

One of the most powerful ways to learn is to read regularly. Ask friends or colleagues for recommendations, and buy or borrow some books. Get into the habit of reading at a particular time of day – perhaps on the train to work, during your lunch break, or before dinner in the evenings. This doesn’t need to cost you anything – use your local library, download free books onto your Kindle or ask to borrow from friends.

If you drive to work, how about getting audio books to listen to? These are a great way to fill up time where you’d otherwise be a bit bored but when you need your hands and eyes for what you’re doing. (A lot of people like to listen to audio content in the gym or while doing chores, too.) Again, you don’t have to spend money: try this list of free audio booksfor a good starting point.

Challenge Yourself

Finally, give yourself a challenge or two. Next time you say, “I can’t”, stop and think. Maybe you really can’t cook … yet. There’s nothing stopping you learning.

Sure, you might find that you just don’t enjoy cooking. But at least you’ll know that you could put together a meal if you had to.

We start at a zero skill level for everything in life. Just because you can’t currently play the piano doesn’t mean that you’ll never be able to. With the internet, there’s a huge amount of content on every topic you can think of – and loads of it will be aimed at beginners.

What would you like to learn? What’s stopping you?

Author: Ali Luke

Original Link: http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/5-ways-to-keep-learning-and-why-you-want-to/

Five Ways to Manage Your Emotions At Work

Your boss often gets away with emotional outbursts, while you many not. However, if bosses are prone to reacting before they act, they may lose the best of their team. With companies closely looking at employee behaviour, emotions have to be managed, just like everything else.

Look for the Trigger

Understanding the right emotion that triggers an employee's optimal performance is important, says consultant Kumud Rajendran. Thus, if an employee balks at the idea of a challenge, then he has to be motivated and encouraged to take up a job while another who loves challenges needs to be told that he probably will not succeed, so that he immediately readies himself for the task.

Do the Balancing Act

A boss has often to show his true feelings when he needs to bond with the team, and mask them when the situation demands it, says Prateek Srivastava, south head for advertising firm Ogilvy and Mathur (O&M). For some one who does not get angry, Srivastava often has to pretend to be so with team members so they know they cannot get away with mistakes.

Make Emotions an Ally

If the team is emotionally charged, their motivation is higher than a group that takes it up as another KRA. "Emotions are best way to move in the right direction," says SM Gupta, chief people officer of BPO Aegis. He encourages open-ended behaviour where he can detect passion towards work and channelise it so that employees give of their best.

Rein in some Emotions

There are some unspoken rules that differentiate the boss from a junior. While the boss can get away with angry outbursts, for a subordinate, a similar feeling is best gutted or hidden. He may be better off explaining later that a particular decision did not go down well with him, but cannot allow his emotions a free hand, which will get him a black mark.

Value Rationality Too

During an appraisal, the boss may not laud every goal met but exaggerate the failure, and a teammate might be prone to provoke you when you are at your weakest. In times like these, play your moves like a game of chess, which requires rational thinking, without getting emotional at provocations. You can counter-argue, emphasise and still control your emotions, which will ultimately win the battle for you.

Devina Sengupta, ET Bureau Jan 10, 2012,

Original Link: http://articles.economictimes.indiatimes.com/2012-01-10/news/30611567_1_emotions-boss-angry-outbursts